I went into a technology hibernation for a few months. It was started by my computer dying on me. After several tries to bring it back from the dead I gave up. About a month later I started looking into getting a computer and about a week ago that new computer showed up! Tech breaks are a good thing. I got a lot of reading and thinking and crafting done during that time. Now I am back.
The biggest change is that I have ended Borealis Meditation Podcast. I touched on my reasons in the last episode but I wanted to get back into that, because I think it is really important. I started the podcast with the intention of giving back to the community. I wanted to share what I had learned in my years in school, in hopes that it would help others connect with their environment. However, I noticed myself being drawn into the traps of the internet. It started to be more about the attention, the likes, shares, and numbers than just selflessly giving. It is a very easy trap to fall into since we are hard wired to want praise and attention. The internet is excellent at lighting up the pleasure centers of our brains.
It is a constant battle when you are fighting your biology. I needed the break. I needed to let go of that project and retreat into myself. As much as I know sharing about your path helps others, I have started to feel the need to go back to my quiet solitary ways. It was so tempting to share all about my path that it wasn’t for me anymore. So I am going to take my path deep into the woods, and just peak my head out to share every now and then. I have needed a refocusing on me. My core doesn’t feel pure. I am not sure if that even makes sense, but that is how it feels. I was feeling selfish, and I didn’t like it. I also don’t like that I haven’t been very good at getting to know you guys more. I am going to try and fix that!
It is SPRING! Things are growing and the world is full of possibility! I’m not sure what lies ahead of me (literally I don’t know where I will be living this time next year….) but I am excited. Right before my computer died I was thinking about writing more. Now that I have a computer again I am thinking about doing that. I might try some things out on the blog. I have a million ideas as usually but I am not sure if I can grab them and nail them down on paper… I want to write more, and read more. I am going to try and clean up my twitter and bloglovin’ feeds so that I can actually follow what is going on instead of just skim by. Who knows how successful that will be. Hope all is well!